Gray

What is this? Love?
I don't feel the same
Don't believe what this is
Could be given a name.

I woke, You were there
tracing planets on my forehead
But I'll forget 23...
Like I'll forget 17...
And I'll forget my first love
Like you'll forget a daydream.

.Kiana.

Running

.Kiana.

No Make-Up

Love this Gemini.



.Kiana.

By: Nefertiti Bartley

Indeed. Rape is a crime. But I need to get my hands on his mind..cause this brother so eloquent and wise..easy on my eyes..leaves my spirit mesmerized..he...is...fly. :) Just let me get him on the phone..give him directions to my home..lay out the carpet for his throne..and wash his feet...ask him to be my Heru and get deep. And I confess...i wouldnt mind being his Auset...talk about the Kemetic science..and how knowledge is our reliance..and our spiritual defiance against the president..because he is far from heaven sent...but back to my love story....i just wanna admire his beauty and his glory...from every freckle on his face...to the way his lips taste...i desire him to be mine. I want eternity with his mind.

A Love Like This Before

If he only gave love
The scale's algorithm wouldn't benefit the pressure
The multitude of reasons would be too much for his love letter
If he only gave love
made love
It'd consist of late nights and early mornings
Stillness at the crack of dawn and
The presence of a baby's yawn.
His Lady's yawn.
If he only gave love.
Real love.  Brave love.
Love-Love, like this before.
If only.

.Kiana.

Peace of Mind

“I trust every part of you, cuz all that I… All that you say you do
You love me despite myself, sometimes I fight myself
I just can’t believe that you, would have anything to do
With someone so insecure, someone so immature
Oh you inspire me, to be the higher me
You made my desire pure, you made my desire pure
Just tell me what to say, I can’t find the words to say
Please don’t be mad with me, I have no identity
All that I’ve known is gone, all I was building on..
Oh I wanna understand, the meaning of your embrace
I know now I have to face, the temptations of my past
Please don’t let me disgrace, will my devotion last?
Now that I know the truth, now there is no excuse
Keeping me from your love, what was I thinking of?
Holding me from your love, what was I thinking of?
You are my peace of mind, that old me is left behind….”

— Lauryn Hill

Soldier

Heartbreak made me Stronger

Made You Stronger

Made Us Soldiers.

I know what it feels like to feel that the world is not enough. Battlegrounds with climaxes, the ever-rising fuk'n Phoenix, and burning embers thriving in a desolate rumble.

When your worries are clenched around your chest and you're stuck in the rubble. Tight rope walking over words like hopeless. And trouble.

When you're stifled yet choking. When a love interest leaves you bodied in a bag and soul broken. Slained by lead butterflies, bag unzipped and left open to be stepped on by cement heels.

You're too withered to boast so you quietly lament with how you feel. Having open conversations with bare walls that understands what you're saying but has yet to confirm or reveal.

So you won't find her. You won't let love in because she'll inevitably become your painful reminder. And you don't want to be reminded.

Well, you're runnin'.

Cause this new dame has the same knife that got you twice done in

All the love that you let out wasn't reciprocated so when all the happiness and fun ends? You're gunnin'.

Be done then.

Say love doesn't live there. Say love is a losing game played by fools who'd never win here.

But don't say humanity is why you've been scared.

I've been there. Suffered quietly for 10 years. When smiles in love were simultaneously taken in exchange for my last tears. But I'm thankful to God I'm past fear.

That last affair - He made me a Soldier. I spent the last 7 years of my life growing colder. Trying to fill an empty space that made me weaker - silence compounded with cold shoulders.

There were things I wasn't allowed to feel. And through spoken word, I finally got a chance to dissolve all these pains I wasn't allowed to heal. A lot of shit on my mind had bottled up and was never revealed. So forever silent, I escaped to a foreign land just so I could catch my breath and deal.

This pen? My shield. And this paper? The tourniquet. It was my God-given right to write and honor it. So when I write? I'm fond of it.

So you can do better.

Wifey could be three times the lady and help you get new. Even if you can't find her, best believe she'll find you.

Just let her.

Http://MzWordsmith.Tumblr.com

I used to bite my nails as a kid. Did it until I was about 21 years old, when someone from my childhood whom I cared about told me to let them grow out. He's a jerk, we're no longer in sync, but they've been growing ever since.

I never took for granted the little things.

4 Tears

this morning he dropped a snippet. I made a video.
We go good together dont we lol.

The Internet

What happened to make you.. Make you start to hate me?
I once was your heart, we were in love
And you were my everything
Sometimes I wonder why… I still try.

Don’t say it’s over.

'Cause we both know no one’s perfect
Baby i feel like this could be worth it, o-oh
'Cause i haven’t felt much myself lately
What i gotta do to get back my baby? o-oh

.Kiana.

The Faithful

Some people can't even be faithful to God
But think they can be faithful to a woman.

I Miss You

He is so Beautiful. Such a Beautiful Soul.



I Miss You... Like Every Day
Wanna Be With You... But You're Away
Said I Miss You. Miss You Insane.
If I Got With You.... It Wouldn't Feel The Same

.Kiana.

From New Orleans to LA

March 18, 2011, 12:54PM



.Kiana.

Once in a Lifetime

I am the "Once In a LIFEtime" that he let get away. But there are no hard feelings once hearts are mended. The Favorite girl will continue to be just that - his favorite lady. He will still want to hang out with her. He will still look to her for words of encouragement & advice. Hell, he will still call just to talk about nothing. She was the master to all those LITTLE things he took for granted.

JUST A SNEAKY REMINDER OF HOW FUCKING AWESOME HE/THEY/ALL HAD IT!!!

The Weeknd

I left my girl back home, I dont love her no more
And she'll never fukn know that
These fuk'n eyes that i'm staring at

Let me see that ass
Look at All this cash
And i emptied out my cards too
Now i'm fuk'n leaning on that

Bring your Love baby, I could bring my shame
Bring the drugs baby, I could bring my pain
I got my heart right here
I got my scars right here
Bring the cups baby, I can bring the drank
Bring your body baby, I can bring you Fame
That's my muhfuk'n words too
Just let me muhfuk'n love you

Listen ma, i'll give you all i got
Give me all for this
I need confidence in myself
Listen ma i'll give you all of me
Give me all of it
I need all of it to myself

So tell me you love me.
(Only for tonight, only for tonight)
Even though you dont love me
Just tell me you love me
(I'll give you what I need, i'll give you what I need)
Even though you dont love me

Let me see you dance
I love to watch you dance
Take you down another level
Get you dancing with the Devil
Take a shot of this
But i'm warning you
I'm on that shit that you cant smell baby
So put down your perfume.

Bring your Love baby, I could bring my shame
Bring the drugs baby, I could bring my pain
Oh, I got my heart right here
Oh, I got my scars right here
Bring the cups baby, I could bring the drank
Bring your body baby, I could bring you Fame
And that's my muhfuk'n word too
ay, so let me muhfuk'n love you

Listen ma, i'll give you all i got
Give me all for this
I need confidence in myself
Listen ma, i'll give you all of me
Give me all of it
I need all of it to myself

So tell me you love me.
(Only for tonight, only for tonight)
Even though you dont love me
Oh, Just tell me you love me
(I'll give you what I need, i'll give you what I need)
Even though you dont love me